Life In The Rain

Introspection

by john on Jan.13, 2008, under Life, Travel


I’m sure those who got into the routine of reading this website regularly have been disappointed at the slow down in posts over the last six months. I know, I used to have a few blogs I’d read myself to tide through lunchtime at work. The good news is that I don’t intend to stop posting, but I’m afraid I could never guarantee the same through put again. There was something comforting about posting up the activities of the last week when traveling, like that girl using the camera in the Blair Witch Project. It was good to know some people would get a buzz from hearing about strange places and people as I came in contact with them and it would be hard to deny the value in being able to look over posts many years later and relive some of the cool experiences had. Actually just thirty minutes ago I was looking at a t.v. show were people were bathing along side working elephants and I thought to myself “it must be an honour to get to see those creatures in the flesh” when I suddenly remembered I’d been nestled on the neck of a rather large one, legs behind its ears one hot sunny day not so long ago. So perhaps one idea of all this blogging is that I used it to get my own “closure” or to store events very quickly to move onto the next thing, instead of fully soaking them up at the time, allowing for a slower release months or years later. I know that at the time, strange life and chaotic living became the norm. The remarkable unremarkable. Hmm, how did it take me so many sentences to say “I used to have something to talk about” and “I had more energy for the blog back then”.

So I’ve not as much to say. Well maybe that’s not true, like everyone, we have the details of our day to day lives and they could easily fill a post or two. But because they often involve other people who don’t want their lives all over the internet and contexts that are not universal they don’t make for good public consumption. Needless to say my mind feels as active, if not more, for day to day events. I’m currently consumed with things like ordinary differential equations and physics simulations as well as efficient living and study. Things that this blog was probably supposed to cover when I first made it, a blog about a games developer living in Ireland, who happened to like a song called “Life in the rain” by Quantic. That might be where the blog goes in future, although I’ve johnokane.com registered should I need it for career oriented things. All the travel posts are going to move into a travel section, split by world region in a chronological order, maybe with some select pictures.

I will probably travel again, though not as long, maybe two months, max four months at a time. It takes about three months to fully get into the groove and the process of getting there is the most exciting part. Top of the list is Nepal/Tibet followed by maybe Scandinavia or a bit of Africa but there isn’t a strong urge to do this in the next few years. In fact, my urge for travel was based on what felt like a closing window of opportunity and me not wanting regret missing that opportunity. Not everyone gets a chance to do it the way I did and for that I’m very grateful to both my parents for supporting me like they did. One side effect of traveling in poorer countries is that it untangled me from a whole pile of envy and lust I might have had for those I perceived to be better off when living in Ireland. The small and petty things that matter no longer matter when put into context along side someone who cannot trust their local police man, cannot get an education and must collect plastic bottles for a living. And they are often as content as I am. That sense of need to travel mentioned above would be an example of the somewhat petty angst that just isn’t important in the grand scheme of things. No matter how bad you think you have it, there are many people doing a lot worse. Teenagers crying for Britney on the Internet is an example of pure madness. I’ll be 30 in just over a year, I can imagine if I hadn’t got out there and learned some perspective I’d be rather cut up over where I am and what I’d achieved, blah blah blah. Eh, get over it, be happy you are alive and have people you love and love you.

So some boxes were definitely ticked. Since coming home from Japan I feel much more confident, self assured and I’ve learned plenty of habits and tricks that just help out day to day. Priorities are clearer, I’m happy to make a call on something and be wrong for it, I’m happy not to give a damn some times and just go with the flow. I’ve moved from clingy and needy to independent. Next stage is independent and cooperative, yeah, become a little too independent these days. The future at the moment is rather blank to be honest, but I’m comfortable with that. Having a plan that stretches as far as next October is fine by me. I vaguely intend to move out of Ireland for a few years, bar a better reason to stay (job offer that can’t be turned down, a beautiful girl etc.) and experience working life in another country. Where depends on job possibilities. I’m hoping west cost Canada, but beggars can’t be choosers. Many Canadians were great advertisements for their country and the scenery sounds extremely good. From all my experiences one place that tugs at my heart strings is the south island of New Zealand, but I don’t see the work possibilities and it’s so far away. Argentina in the Bariloche region would be nice too. Singapore is a possibility as well. The world is not a big place these days.

Anyway, this is good bye for the travel writing and traveling in general. I hope that everyone got something of value out the blog while the trip was happening. A topic I never really covered is encouraging people to travel if they feel a desire to do so. In this sense I agree with the book the Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, who puts it in an interesting way. During your life, you and other people will put pressure on yourself to do things a certain way, get married, settle down now, run the farm, look after people, stay put, don’t do anything dangerous, or worst of all, live in fear. It is your right in life to ignore those pressures and do what you need to do. Should you not, you will only develop a strong regret or even hatred of yourself and those who pressured you. If they really want whats best for you they will let you go and you should get out of your comfort zone, contentment can be laziness. Go do what you want to do and be happy. Bye!


2 Comments for this entry

  • Catherine

    Hey dearest cousin John!

    Dad wants to order a large print of one of your Gallery photos – he was describing it to me, but maybe you could help him out by giving the Cotters a call!!

    I’ll e-mail you very soon,
    CC

  • john

    Hello Catherinest Cacky,

    Hope you are doing well there in the windy place. I’ll get in contact with uncle P before I make an order of prints myself so that he can get a copy of the one he wants. I’m fairly certain I know which it is too. Keep well,

    John.

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